Vicki is my best friend who also happens to be my sister. Growing up we shared a room until she went off to college. Our mom never allowed us that luxury of our own space. I didn’t understand it back then, but today I understand it completely. That closeness forged an unbreakable bond. It gave us the skills to learn how to share later in life and the knowledge that life is not just about ourselves. Did we fight?? Of course! She was the one who pulled (ripped) a tooth from my mouth. I was just showing her where the loose tooth was and she yanked it right out. Another time I was pestering her to see if she could touch my toes while I laid on my back on the bed. Of course she could touch them and PULL them as well! She pulled me right out of the bed and broke my collarbone. I ran downstairs to tell my Mom and Dad that my shoulder hurt. By this time they were ready for us to go to bed and be quiet. You parents know how that goes! My mom told me to get back upstairs and as I passed my Dad I said ” Dad, my arm really hurts!” His response- ” Can you move it?” Of course I could move it back and forth, that didn’t involve the collarbone. Once I laid down in bed I couldn’t get back up. I was awake all night with a broken collarbone. I had to ask my sister to call our Mom up to our room to help me get up. When she tried to lift me up- we ALL know what she saw- that my collarbone was BROKEN! Off to the emergency room! Ahh the guilt.
Summers were spent at our cottage in Wisconsin. Once again- sharing a room. Days were spent in the water floating on rafts only coming out to eat lunch and wait for that mandatory hour before we were back in the water. Summer nights were spent on our porch that overlooked the lake. Even now as I write that, I can remember it clearly. I can close my eyes and remember the smell of the lake water, the sounds of the boats as they crossed over the water, the sound of the waves and the laughter of other families across the lake. I can see my father standing on the porch, cigarette in hand, waiting for the next storm to arrive. He loved a good summer thunderstorm.
As my sister and I grew older, I looked up to her. She had a sense of style-her hair was always perfect, the makeup was as well. I was blessed with horrible eyesight that required those lovely pink pointy glasses of the 60’s. Blind as a bat! She went off to college and it was then I had my own room but only until she was home to visit. Later she married and moved out to Idaho. I didn’t get to see her as often and I was off on my own adventures. It was when we both were married that our bond grew stronger. We confided in each other, talked on the phone for hours. I would take my children and go and visit her in the fall because her husband had his annual harvest that took him away from morning to night. We tried new recipes, jigsaw puzzles, needlepoint and all the while continued to build that unbreakable bond.
There was a time in our lives where we grew apart. It was such a lonely time for me. I missed that closeness and really felt like I had lost my best friend. I know now that she was feeling the exact same way. I had made a huge decision that she didn’t agree with and we didn’t talk for a very long time. I would reach out and call only to leave a message for her. She wouldn’t return the call but she would email a response. Little by little we found our way back. I would continue to tell her that it was ok that she didn’t agree with my decisions. I still loved her anyway. It just meant we didn’t agree. It didn’t change how I felt about her. Several years ago, she had a cancer scare and had to have surgery to remove a hamstring muscle. I was there to help take care of her as she recovered. I drove her around and more importantly became that shoulder for her to lean on.
Fast forward to today-I know that I can depend on her to be there for me no matter what. I know that I can count on her to be that friendly shoulder that I can cry on. She and I can laugh until we cry. We can be in the same room reading and never say a word but we know that through it all, we will always be there for each other. We know it and it doesn’t ever have to be spoken out loud for anyone to hear. The important thing is we know it.
I know she would think this is a horrible photo. For me it says why I love her. She was laughing at me and told me not to take it. Looking at it now I see exactly what I was hoping for- laughter and joy, which are the things she gives to me.
